I pulled open the door of the angel and before it had even swung shut behind me, Brendan was pouring me a pint of Stella. I frontled up to the bar (which is a manouvre much like sidled, but is more direct) and smiled him a smile and spake thus,

"A pint of Guiness please"

"Well you can have one of them after this pint of Stella"

He does delight in having your drink pouring before you walk in through the door. He used to be able to do this quite well as he could spot me on the other side of City Road waiting for the lights to allow me to cross - the Zebra crossing almost deposits you on the pub doorstep.

To combat this, I have taken to sneaking up on the bar, by way of crossing at the Old Street roundabout and therefore appearing, all sudden like, outside the pub just before I reach for the door handle.

It's little games like this that make working in this dump bearable.

In fact, it was my first visit to the Angel since Thursday last week. I must be slipping. Or trying to loose weight.

And a pre recorded, disinterested northern accented female voice says,

“Please be aware, that some users cannot access the mainframe, and this is being dealt with under ABC12345, should your call be urgent then ……”

So you know that I cant actually do any damn work then? Oh Good. No hint of a clue of a predicted possible time that we might, possibly maybe perhaps be actually able to maybe connect to the mainframe then?

Thought not.

This could be linked in with my not being able to access my email. But seeing as I can get on here, and any other damn site I choose EXCEPT AOL, I am confused.

So I can’t receive or send emails, can’t get notification of replies to posts or PM’s, and I cant do any work.

Ciggie time?

I think so.

Can't get to my email account from here!

Fuck it!

I can't read the torrent of emails praising my writing and my wit, I am missing all those offers from hot young women to send me pictures of them naked, all the book offers from publishers and invitations to wild parties!

Well, I can dream can't I.

Till the bastard site starts responding I may well have to do some work!

Fuck.

1. If you had to play a roll in any film past or present , what film would it be and what character would you play?
"A Matter of Life or Death" David Nivens character, the bomber pilot (can't remember the name) Or Kyle Reece in the terminator film.

2. If you had to choose another name for yourself, what would it be?
I actually like being called Nick, but as I have to choose I will say, erm, Horatio. No I have no idea why so dont ask.

3. What is the first thing you notice when meeting someone of the opposite sex?
Depends what angle I am approaching them from. OK enough with the smut, face/eyes. Actually it would be logical to say that I would notice the most noticable thing about them.

4. If you had to move to another country, where would it be?
Cyprus.

5. What are you most proud of about yourself?
I taught myself to play guitar or that I managed to get a certificate in Egyptology.

6. if you wanted to impress someone what would you cook.
My spicey sauce for pasta - creamy and hot. Easy tiger.

7. Name five things you associate with Sweden.
Blondes, beer, mountains, snow, porn.

8. If you were given £300 that you had to spend on yourself in just one shop, what shop would that be?
One of the guitar shops in Denmark street. But it wouldn't go far.

9. Name one living person you would like to meet. And who would that be??
KEEF!

10. If you were to be remembered in the history books, for what would that be?
Not Dying? Being the first man in history to grow all his hair back naturally? The first person on the planet to see the point of golf?

Oh well.