Sarah has decided she wants to keep pet snails.

Trust me, there has been a long path of negotiating downwards to get to snails, she has been through wanting a puppy, a kitten, a rat, a mouse, blah blah blah. So now she has decided on snails.

Good, we have a garden full of them. Sarah got a book from school on what you need to have to keep snails - basically a big container with air holes in the top, soil, stones and some vegetation.

So we go collect the snails from the garden and put them in their new home.

As I am making holes in the lid of the container Sarah is watching over them to make sure they don't escape.

"Daddy, those two are cuddling or fighting"

"No darling, I think they are making baby snails"

"There having sex! Oh good, we will have baby snails"

Some time passes.

"Daddy, they are STILL having sex, how long do they do it for?"

"Hours I think darling"

"Blimey!" said Sarah.

That and a huge jug of black, strong coffee.

Ahem.

Ok, vodka down the thrapple and here my dear 0.5 of a reader, is a question for you (if of course you are still awake and sober. latter one is optional of course)

What, in your humble opinion, is the MOST sexy thing a member of the opposite sex(or same sex if you are so inclined) can wear?

I am refering to sexy bedroom type stuff, but I will allow general clothing if you want.

What gets your little gears meshing then?

Me? well a wet suit with the bum cutout and a bicycle pump MAY feature somewhere, or I could just be lying.