A large glass of red wine, a "seafoam" green telecaster plugged into the tonelab and the Marshall and Planet Rock on the dab radio.

The world is a much better place now.

Mind you I could do with a blow job

Everything cool with all of you?

Can't stand them reeeely. Rubbish on the telly, everything shut and erm, rubbish on the telly.

Get a life man!

So, I think a squint round youtube, a look at msn (mrs F is beeping me constantly as I type - shuddap woman!) and then another glass of something refreshing and a play of one of my many guitars.

Then maybe watch one of the pirates of the carribean films again.

It's a busy whirl I live in no?

Oh shut up!

I just realised, next weekend is the total Wogan fest that is EUROVISION!

And as we all know, every country trys to copy the winning entry from the year before.

So after years of songs with a "tribal/eastern european" drum beat, we should have shit loads of heavy metal bands trying to emulate Lordi's win last year.

WELL BRING IT ON BABY, LETS ROCK!

Mind you, people say germans have no sense of humour, but if you have been watching Eurovision for the past couple of years you know that is not true! Some of there acts have been Hysterical!

So, next Saturday night I will be sitting on the sofa, Sarah and Jo permiting (why do women take up so much bloody room on a sofa) with a supply of "energy" drinks and snacks, and we will laugh and point and giggle.

And of cours, Mr Wogan will take it all sooooo seriously.

As shall we.

Ahem.